When Tatum is working on her business, she’s thinking about her kids. When she’s caring for her kids, she’s thinking about her business. Either way, she’s feeling guilty. Welcome to The Club.
So relatable I too could cry. Thanks for sharing Tatum and Stephanie 💜 Even with only one little one, the struggle juggle is real and so is the guilt. Whenever Aurelien was/is sick (👋 daycare), I feel like the worst mum for not giving him 100% of my time and attention AND I feel like the worst CEO/Founder for not giving 100% to my startup. Truth is we are not 100% mum. Not 100% Founder. We're working mum in tech.
So basically we are a unique hybrid that we can’t figure out ourselves 🤣 love what The Club stands for and can’t wait to read other stories shared by women in tech!
Hard relate to this story! And love the Mums & Co mention, thank you Tatum and Stephanie. This balance is so tricky, and school holidays are the ultimate test of your endurance as a working mum. Proud to be part of the community advocating for support and change here. Great article and terrific newsletter.
Yes! This was one of my most ‘omg me too!’ interviews so far. I just love how open and honest Tatum is, and how she shows we can love both (and all) aspects of our lives so much, but still struggle with the balancing act. Thank you for your comment, so happy to have you in our community 💕
Just survived my first school holidays with both kids at home now that my little one is no longer in daycare but pre-kinder - didn't know whether to laugh or cry most days. What I did realise was that the "balance" was often one sided, and that's ok! There's always tomorrow...
Hard relate to the late-night scrolling. Have you heard this term 'revenge procrastination'? It's where we stay up later than we probably should to experience having some kind of control over our time when the rest of the day has been dedicated to external demands. But that sabotages the next day and so on...
I'm not a mum (apart from to Albie the dog), but I am constantly juggling guilt between work, housework, doggy-care and being a 'good enough' partner - I often worry that by the end of the day I'm no fun to be around anymore - I can't imagine adding a child to my internal chaos! Huge respect to you mummas x
Oooh I love the term ‘revenge procrastination’ – that speaks to me in a big way, especially the feeling of self-sabotage, which feels kind of shameful? But I’m so glad to know we’re not alone.
Please know you are managing the work/house/dog/love/life juggle like a total pro, and definitely still fun to be around! x
I don't have kids, but I have a lot of friends who are putting off having kids until their startups are 'ready'. It strikes me that they will never truly be 'ready' though...
Very true Bronte... just like with anything in life, are we ever really ready? Sometimes you just have to dive in, say a prayer, hope for the best and just keep swimming.
I honestly don’t know whether it would be harder to start a business when you already have kids, or to have a kid (or kids) while you’re already running a startup.
For me, having a baby was completely all-consuming – and at 10 months it felt like such a leap even to start freelancing, let alone launching a whole tech business. And I can completely see why people feel their business might suffer if they have a baby.
I don’t think there’s any right answer. Obviously, it will be different for everyone. I just hate the idea of anyone feeling they have to choose one or the other, you know?
I agree. But then there's the flip side, which is that people almost can't choose one or the other. You choose a business over children and you're facing down a ticking biological clock and/or choosing to be 'one of those women' who don't want children versus choosing to be a stay-at-home mum and grappling with what that means as a 'modern feminist'/for your career/what people will think. Gah.
Ugh yes, such a good point. Actually, what I really hate is all of that extra baggage, and the inevitable judgement, and weighing up whether you’re doing the right thing for all woman-kind.
Women in business, in particular, are so often held up as role models, there’s extra pressure there to ‘get it right’ and show what’s possible in terms of ‘having it all’, even though it can be so, so hard.
So relatable I too could cry. Thanks for sharing Tatum and Stephanie 💜 Even with only one little one, the struggle juggle is real and so is the guilt. Whenever Aurelien was/is sick (👋 daycare), I feel like the worst mum for not giving him 100% of my time and attention AND I feel like the worst CEO/Founder for not giving 100% to my startup. Truth is we are not 100% mum. Not 100% Founder. We're working mum in tech.
Oh Marie, I feel the daycare illness/mum guilt/work guilt SO much. I know you're a great mum and a great founder. You've got this, mama 💕
So basically we are a unique hybrid that we can’t figure out ourselves 🤣 love what The Club stands for and can’t wait to read other stories shared by women in tech!
Hard relate to this story! And love the Mums & Co mention, thank you Tatum and Stephanie. This balance is so tricky, and school holidays are the ultimate test of your endurance as a working mum. Proud to be part of the community advocating for support and change here. Great article and terrific newsletter.
Yes! This was one of my most ‘omg me too!’ interviews so far. I just love how open and honest Tatum is, and how she shows we can love both (and all) aspects of our lives so much, but still struggle with the balancing act. Thank you for your comment, so happy to have you in our community 💕
So happy you could relate Stef. Having these conversations openly helps us realise we aren't alone!
Just survived my first school holidays with both kids at home now that my little one is no longer in daycare but pre-kinder - didn't know whether to laugh or cry most days. What I did realise was that the "balance" was often one sided, and that's ok! There's always tomorrow...
Hard relate to the late-night scrolling. Have you heard this term 'revenge procrastination'? It's where we stay up later than we probably should to experience having some kind of control over our time when the rest of the day has been dedicated to external demands. But that sabotages the next day and so on...
I'm not a mum (apart from to Albie the dog), but I am constantly juggling guilt between work, housework, doggy-care and being a 'good enough' partner - I often worry that by the end of the day I'm no fun to be around anymore - I can't imagine adding a child to my internal chaos! Huge respect to you mummas x
Oooh I love the term ‘revenge procrastination’ – that speaks to me in a big way, especially the feeling of self-sabotage, which feels kind of shameful? But I’m so glad to know we’re not alone.
Please know you are managing the work/house/dog/love/life juggle like a total pro, and definitely still fun to be around! x
Is that what it's called? Revenge Procrastination will now be my middle name 😉
I don't have kids, but I have a lot of friends who are putting off having kids until their startups are 'ready'. It strikes me that they will never truly be 'ready' though...
Very true Bronte... just like with anything in life, are we ever really ready? Sometimes you just have to dive in, say a prayer, hope for the best and just keep swimming.
I honestly don’t know whether it would be harder to start a business when you already have kids, or to have a kid (or kids) while you’re already running a startup.
For me, having a baby was completely all-consuming – and at 10 months it felt like such a leap even to start freelancing, let alone launching a whole tech business. And I can completely see why people feel their business might suffer if they have a baby.
I don’t think there’s any right answer. Obviously, it will be different for everyone. I just hate the idea of anyone feeling they have to choose one or the other, you know?
I agree. But then there's the flip side, which is that people almost can't choose one or the other. You choose a business over children and you're facing down a ticking biological clock and/or choosing to be 'one of those women' who don't want children versus choosing to be a stay-at-home mum and grappling with what that means as a 'modern feminist'/for your career/what people will think. Gah.
Ugh yes, such a good point. Actually, what I really hate is all of that extra baggage, and the inevitable judgement, and weighing up whether you’re doing the right thing for all woman-kind.
Women in business, in particular, are so often held up as role models, there’s extra pressure there to ‘get it right’ and show what’s possible in terms of ‘having it all’, even though it can be so, so hard.